You Had Me At Final Exam!

Jessie Markovetz

I had a lot of fun this Thanksgiving weekend. I got to spend time with my friends and family while rekindling my love with professional football. Very quickly, here are some high lights:

5) Finnegan’s Wake 4) Pat’s King Of Steaks 3) The Black Bull 2) When Eli Manning got it handed to him by Jevon Kearse and Co. 1) The Showing of Jerry Maguire on local television.

What a movie. Although I own the DVD, I make it a point to watch Jerry Maguire whenever its on television. I don’t know why, I just do. With that movie fresh on my mind, I, along with my senior classmates, embark on my second-to-last finals week here at Colgate. So, to help with those who are unfamiliar with the home stretch, here are some quotes from my favorite movie to guide you along the way.

“Did you know that the human head weighs eight pounds?” -Ray Boyd

Ray is right. He’s always right. Make sure you keep that in mind when you are cramming for your most difficult final. Your head only can fit eight pounds of knowledge. Don’t go try putting that ninth pound in there. You’ll just squeeze something out that you might need later. As my grandfather always tells me, “Don’t work too hard.” It’s true. Don’t kill yourself.

“I lost the number one draft pick the night before the draft.” -Jerry Maguire”Well, Boo f**ing hoo” -Rod Tidwell

Don’t go telling your professors that your computer broke down or that you lost your 3 by 5 disk. Technically, you’ve had all semester to work on these final papers, so telling them that you had a technical problem the night before it was due won’t do you any good now. Just suck it up and take the hit. Or (gulp) start working on it early.

“Help me Rod. Help me help you.” -Jerry Maguire

Your roommates, classmates and friends are all in the same boat that you are. Don’t be afraid to ask for some guidance and help along the way. They probably need it as much as you do. Your classmates probably know something that you don’t know. You probably know something that they don’t know. Take some time to pick each other’s brains. You had to have daydreamed at some point in the semester, right?

“Don’t worry, I’m not gonna do what you all think I’m gonna do, which is, you know, FLIP OUT!” -Jerry Maguire

Spending too much time in Case has been proven to cause emotional, physical and mental trauma. If you have too much work to do, be sure to switch up your study spots every few hours. Head to Cooley or the Coop. An unknown favorite of mine is the bridge on second floor Persson. There are dozens of study spots. Take advantage of them as much as possible.

“I love him. I love him for the man he wants to be and the man he almost is.” -Dorothy Boyd

Don’t try to be what you’re not this week. If studying one thing for 8 hours will increase your grade one point, just forget it and move on. Try to figure out where you can increase your grade the most and focus there. A huge mistake some students make is when they get frustrated over one issue. Chances are that thing you can’t grasp won’t be on the exam anyway. Just forget it and move on. Just make sure that you understand the basic concepts.

“You complete me.” -Jerry Maguire

Visit your professors. But, please, be prepared with something. There’s nothing that professors hate more than the student who comes in the day before the exam and says ‘I don’t get anything.’ Be as specific as possible. It shows that you have spent some time with the material and have kept up in class.

“You had me at hello.” -Dorothy Boyd

First impressions mean everything. A professor will frown upon your final papers if they are not properly edited, you know? Take a glance or two after you are done and make sure you have proper citations, a cover page, separate headlines and page numbers (not on the first page).

“Marcie! Marcie! We did it! We did it! Wooo! Wooo! Ya know? Ya know?!” -Rod Tidwell

It’s a great feeling once it’s all over. Walking out after that final test can’t be topped. Enjoy that walk back to your room. It’s a sweet feeling.