Minus the City: Keep It Casual
Casual hookups: They first began on college campuses and, thanks to MTV, have made their way from the Jersey Shore to Miami. Upon close examination I have to ask: does the casual hook-up actually exist? Even within the arena of dating in college the term “hooking up” can mean several different things. Some say that you have to have sex with someone for it to be considered a hook-up. Others just think making out in your bed and sleeping over is considered hooking up. We won’t even get into the complications created by hooking up with people on a small campus (trust me, there are eyes and ears everywhere). With all these different connotations, hooking up has become way too complicated and made it hard to keep things casual. However, after some research I have come to find that many people plan on keeping it informal. But unfortunately, sometimes science stands in the way of a good time. After all, wasn’t it Freud who said, “Our libido is the basic and most powerful human drive?”
It all begins with some casual talking or grinding at the Jug, but beware. Something so innocent could turn serious back in the bedroom. When men and women engage in sex or sexual acts, different levels of hormones are released and as a result men and women feel differently about their partners after doing the deed. Men and women both release high amounts of the hormone called “oxytocin,” also known as the “cuddle hormone” when engaging in sexual acts. It can make you feel more attached, bonded and trusting of your sexual partner. Unfortunately, it has been researched that women feel the effects of this hormone more than men do, because of higher estrogen levels in women. The higher levels of testosterone in men suppress oxytocin’s effects. In order to try and keep things informal we have to understand why these bonding feelings come about in the first place.
Boys, next time you find yourself in a confusing and awkward relationship try to remember that it’s not our fault that we felt a connection with you. Jamie Foxx told us to “Blame it on the Alcohol” when we should’ve been blaming it on our reproductive organs. So in the end, one of the ways for a casual hook-up to actually exist would be to ignore these feelings we have after “hooking up” and stick to business. Some suggestions to keep it casual would be no cuddling and no sleeping over, just make sure to kick him or her out of your bed before the cruiser makes its last run up the hill.
I also find the most convenient hook-ups are with people you may have liked in the past but now you are only attracted to physically and who know your sexual likes and dislikes.
I’m not saying you can’t be friends with someone you’re casually hooking up with, but that you have to lay out some boundaries before someone starts to bring up the idea of being “exclusive.” What a crazy concept for people to consider before checking out the new pledge classes!