Colgate’s Advice Columnist Tackles Both Long- and Short-term Relationships

Dear Rosie

Dear Rosie,

The past few times I’ve made it into the Jug, I have had some trouble with my dance partners. They seem like nice guys at first, but by the end of the night they won’t leave me alone. I am just so inexperienced when it comes to Jug etiquette. The worst was this weekend. My guy friend wouldn’t let go of me and when the lights came on and “New York, New York” started to play, he assumed we were going back to his room. I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but there is no way I would ever hook up with him! How can I get rid of these “dirty dancers?”


Love Auditorium

Dear Love Auditorium,

This is a common problem for girls in the Jug. First of all, if the guy who gave you a hard time last weekend is a good friend, make it clear that you are not planning on hooking up with him. Jug etiquette may seem tricky at first, but it is pretty simple to master. The key is to be assertive and confident. If things between you and your dance partner are becoming borderline inappropriate, tell him you need to leave and then walk away. Always be polite, and keep in mind that you are not obligated to hook up with anyone. Don’t let a guy assume you are going to go home with him when “New York, New York” comes one, and if he does, be assertive and tell him no. It is important, however, that you do not spend the night leading a guy on. Many girls do this in the Jug, and it can be incredibly confusing for your dance partner. The Jug is a fun place… keep it that way!

Dear Rosie,

I have decided to stay with my high school boyfriend, but I don’t know if it is a good decision or not. I think I love him, but don’t know if I want to be with one person for the rest of my life. My plan right now is to continue to go out with him until the beginning of my senior year. Then I am going to break up with him, have a couple months of being single and then see how I feel. If after this I am still in love with him, I am going to get back together with him. The only problem with this plan is I don’t want things to change between us. I love our relationship right now and I’m afraid our months of being apart might change this. Please Help!


Confused in Cobb

Dear Confused in Cobb,

Long distance relationships are always tricky to manage. It is not my place to advise you to break up or stay with your boyfriend. Some questions you should ask yourself are: why do you want to wait until senior year to break up with him? What is the point of being single for a few months? More importantly, what happens if you discover it is fun being single? Will you then be a second semester senior who wishes she had been single for her entire Colgate experience? Also, do you really think your boyfriend is going to let you break up with him for a short period of time? On the other hand, how do you feel about him experiencing the single life for a month or two? I wish I could help answer some of these questions, but it is not my place to decide the outcome of your relationship. Be true to yourself.