Minus the City: Love in the Time of Loss

As I sit down to write this article on Sunday, nothing comes to mind. This column is meant to be a relationship column, more or less. Topics generally include musings of an overthinker.  However, in times like this, I find it hard to focus on thinking about the specifics of the past, when everything comes to halt in the present, in light of the recent tragic event the Colgate community is facing. We have been reminded of what is important, and are caught reflecting on all that we have or have not done when two members of our community, Carey and Ryan, have been taken from us far too soon. 

The loss of loved ones—our community members, in this case—offers us perspective. We are reminded of our own mortality, and we are reminded that despite what we may think, we are not invincible. Take this as a reminder to take the time to truly care for those around you, as our time is limited. Love a little more, and say it. Show how much you value those around you in our community, especially in times like this. 

The community’s grief and mourning will be evident in our actions. We will continue with our hearts a little bit heavier, and we will show the love. We’ll hug a little longer, offer a smile to more people, ask the important question of “how are you?” in passing and actually mean it.

This sort of perspective is a byproduct of a tragic event—one that we should keep in mind as time passes and does its best to heal. This perspective includes the importance of not getting caught up in the petty thingsfor example, relationship trouble or woes that I so often use this column to write about. Ask yourself the question: “Does this really matter?” It’s easy to be narrow-minded, but it is more important to look at the big picture and think about whether such details truly matter in the grand scheme of things. Say you love those around you while you still can. Don’t forget the transient nature of our time here on Earth, together. 

The sight of all of the members of our community who showed up to Monday’s vigil, candle in hand, light surrounding us, was beautiful. We weren’t just looking at support, we were looking at love. Let’s not lose sight of that love, Colgate. We love you, Carey and Ryan.