Entering the first year at college, it’s far too easy to become that roommate — the one who tiptoes out of the room, letting their roommate have their… privacy. It’s your room, too, but when a third person is involved — like your roomie’s hookup — it becomes a three-way relationship no one signed up for. In their defense, it can be awkward to whip out one’s phone before getting hot and heavy to send a warning, but walking into your room to find it transformed into a passion pit is enough to make anyone question dorm life. Being overly accommodating is a common trap. It’s easy to feel like the third wheel in what’s supposed to be a personal sanctuary. Yet what takes the cake is the inevitable scenario: a three-person sleepover with everyone catching awkward sleep in an already cramped room.
But then there’s the other kind of roommate — the one who refuses to budge on overnight guests. The one whose roommate runs their dorm room like a dictatorship: no men allowed, ever. This means no exceptions for a casual movie night, a tame overnight stay or even for a long-distance partner coming as a surprise for the weekend. Imagine balancing romance and college life with someone who treats your shared space like a monastery. If you’re hooking up with someone in a Gate House triple room, I fear you may be in an even more precarious and logistically complicated situation. So, what’s the solution? It’s still early enough in the semester to set some boundaries… best strike while the irons are hot! How do we balance respecting our roommate’s space while enabling the hookups that come with college life?
If the dorm lottery didn’t bless you with a single room, it’s really about roommate-to-roommate negotiation. And it’s not just about scheduling a roommate’s hookup, it is about setting clear boundaries for shared spaces. You’ve got to be upfront with each other: Yes, I respect your right to have your fling, but also, can I not be within earshot while you do it? Maybe this is the moment you sit down with your roommate and suggest a schedule, a compromise that lets you both live your lives.
Maybe it’s as simple as agreeing to send a heads-up text, or maybe you’ll want to go the extra mile and establish an ever-so-sacred “quiet time.” Remember, it’s all about finding that delicate balance — because, let’s be real, nobody wants to be the roommate that ruined the mood, or the roommate who missed out on their fun to fulfill the dutiful role of a ‘real one.’ So, let’s cheer on mastering the art of cohabitation — who says our assigned Community Leaders have to handle everything?
