Our generation is unique because most of us grew up on the cusp of technology taking off so many of our childhoods were marked by tech-free memories as well as the beginnings of a technology-dominated society. It is undeniable that phones help connect us to those we love the most, find communities of like-minded people with similar interests and learn new information with less effort. However, when I am trying to hang out with you or engage you in conversation, there is no need to let a screen capture all your attention. Extreme cases excluded, why ask me to hang out if you’re just going to spend all your time glued to a phone? Simply put, social skills are deteriorating around the world due to phones and social media, and the art of conversation has declined with our generation.
Maybe this is more of a popular than unpopular opinion, but if that is so, why do so many people refuse to act on it? I would venture to say that most people believe it is better to talk and hang out with their friends than to spend all that time mindlessly doomscrolling on social media, yet wherever I go out, most people have no awareness of their surroundings or the people around them because of a small screen.
Now, this isn’t to say that we need to get rid of phones at all, but that it is more than reasonable not to want them out at a dinner table or during a hangout with friends. Human interaction is so important for people, which is a lesson the world learned during quarantine a little over five and a half years ago when everyone was locked away in their homes and dealing with the fallout of not having nearly as much interaction with the people around them.
As a society, we have readily acknowledged the negative effects of quarantine on mental health, which again is partially due to a decrease in opportunities to socialize with the other people in our communities, but we less-readily see the effects of phone addiction through the same lens. We consume unfathomable amounts of media every day through the use of our phones, amounts that have never come close to being seen at any other point in history, whether before phones or immediately after their creation. The amount of content available to us is so great that terms like doomscrolling, media saturation overload, headline anxiety and media overconsumption were created and popularized on varying levels. With this overconsumption, however, there is a decrease in actual, meaningful conversations between people and the skills that accompany them.
Instead of scrolling through Instagram Reels or TikTok, checking Snapchat or a million other things our phones are capable of, we should put them on silent and kept away so we can fully enjoy the company of the people around us. It is a problem if someone cannot resist the urge to go on their phone every 20 minutes.
The difference between what is online and what is right in front of us is that the internet does not go away. There will always be more time to scroll on social media, but there is very limited time to spend with people we care about. Eventually, we will run out of time, and the best memories, the ones we hold onto and share stories about, are never about the two hours we spent watching ten-second videos online. The stories we do tell people are almost always about spending time with each other, creating memories and bonds that last a lifetime instead of just ten seconds.
What I hope is abundantly clear by now is that we allow our phones to dictate too much of our lives and how we use our time. The only question then is at what cost? Choosing between social media and talking to each other should be one of the easiest choices for us to make as a society, but it consistently seems to be one of the hardest. So, I challenge everyone to put down their phones when walking around campus or eating at the dining halls and watch just how consumed everyone is by our screens. Instead of allowing ourselves to be controlled by it, we could learn more about each other and our experiences. The person sitting next to you in the library, in the dining halls or before class could be a lifelong friend – if we only look past the screens and at each other.
